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Vernacular Misuse Pet Peeves

Vernacular Misuse Pet Peeves
Okay... I smell I rant coming on.


I'm not talking about colloquialisms and regional accents. I'm not talking about typos in written text.

I'm talking about people totally unable to speak their native tongue. (English)

These are things I hear all the time that drive me up a wall and make that little vein behind my eye twitch.

"I feel like a weight has been TOOKEN off my shoulders"

It' s TAKEN YOU RETARD! "Tooken" is not a word!

"We were conversating" "We conversate"

You were having a CONVERSATION and CONVERSING to CONVERSE is to speak! To TALK! Which you obviously can't do!

"He stoled that"


"I have boughten/boughtted a new blouse"

You BOUGHT a new blouse! To BUY something in the past tense.

You went to BUY a blouse

You have BOUGHT a blouse. There is no past tense for Bought, it IS the past tense.

Things like this, total disregard for speaking your native language is an insult. Yet, I hear these things every day.

Especially on Shows Like "Judge Judy" and "The People's Court" I cringe, I cry, I want to throw things.

It's amazing how COMMON these phrases are and accepted!

These are not words you are speaking people. They aren't words at all in our language.

Please listen to yourselves and try not to sound like complete idiots when you speak.

If you said those things in a Job interview with me? I'd not hire you.

Why?Because you sound uneducated and like a dolt and it gives me theimpression you have not the brain capacity to think so why would Iwaste my time on you?

Language is so very important, communication defines you.

For instance... I know I cannot say the word "anonymity" ... I cannot wrap my tongue around it. I've tried, I've practiced. I've failed miserably to say this word,

So, instead of saying: "He wishes to retain is anonymity" I CHOOSE CONSCIOUSLY TO REPHRASE into something I can say:

"He wishes to remain anonymous."

I can say "anonymous" so I choose to sound EDUCATED and speak properly.

It's not that difficult. But everyday... I hear speech patterns that make me want to go postal.

So what gets your goat?



( 20 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:15 am (UTC)
I want to axe you a question.
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:59 am (UTC)
that one too! RAWR!
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:25 am (UTC)
It's more of an accent thing, but I really can't stand 'Wash' or anything with that word in it to be pronounced like 'Worsh'. My housemate's got that sort of accent and it drives up the freaking wall.
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:59 am (UTC)
Yeah, that's just a colloquialism, nothing much any one can do when it's dialect.
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:29 am (UTC)
I feel the same way when I hear co-workers (especially our trainers while in a training session *grrr*) talk about multiple diagnosis-es... I'll be the one in the back of the room wanting to scream IT'S DIAGNOSES, YOU IDIOT!

I've tried to correct a few of them in private, but it never sticks... *sighs* I mustn't be educated enough to be listened to, I guess...
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:58 am (UTC)
You didn't go to medical school.


I hear you there too.
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:34 am (UTC)
"For all intensive purposes..." ...It's "For all INTENTS AND PURPOSES". As in "With every way this could be intended". "Intensive purposes" would mean something completely different, if it even makes any sense, which I'm not sure it does. I've tried picking it apart but it never makes sense in context. And the funniest part is that I've seen people type "for all intents and purposes" and then people try to "correct" them. Hahahahaha.

Also, people using "literally" as a synonym for "really" in the non-literal sense as well. Like "This game is literally kicking my butt" or "I literally died of laughter reading that." ...If you LITERALLY died of laughter, who's talking right now? And what sort of game has feet and can attack you? Warn me, because I sure wouldn't want to buy that one by accident...
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:57 am (UTC)
Literally, I laughed my Ass off....I lost 20 pounds~!

Nov. 5th, 2006 02:40 am (UTC)
I have a similar problem with "horror" and "whore," in a way. To me they sound exactly the same, and I pronounce them both the same, because I can't tell the difference between them. So I generally substitute "scary movie" for "horror" and "prostitute" for "whore." That way people understand what I'm trying to say. The same goes for "pen" and "pin," as well as "girl" and "grill"--the two pairs of words sound the same to me. I can pronounce both "girl" and "grill" correctly--but I have to think about it in order to do so. "Horror" and "whore," though, I've never been able to say right, so I avoid using them. Saves me much grief.

As for "conversate," according to dictionary.com (as well as, if I'm remembering right, my own physical dictionary--though I can't check, since it's currently in one of the many boxes of books in my grandparents' garage), it is a real word, defined as "to socialize and chat; to converse with another." Admittedly its usage is confined to slang, and admittedly I can't stand it when I hear people using it, either, but it does appear to be an actual word.

Other than that, though, I'm in total agreement with everything you wrote. Such things drive me up the wall. Rather like the sheer number of college seniors--writing majors--I met who couldn't tell the difference between "its" and "it's," or "there," "they're," and "their." "Two," "to," and "too" also caused problems, as did "affect" and "effect," among others. These weren't simple typos, either, as the same people made the same mistakes over and over again. What's even worse, though, is that the teachers didn't always correct them--and on occasion, when I attempted to do so, I was told that was just their writing style.

Anyhow, I should probably shut up, now. I could go on for ages about this sort of thing, but that would just annoy people, so I'll quit. Nifty topic to bring up, though. Quite interesting.
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:43 am (UTC)
Ahahah, the "affect" and "effect" thing cracks me up, because once when I was trying to find work, I had my employment counselor ask me what the difference was. I explained it to her, and meanwhile was thinking "You're twice my age, with more education and a real job in public service... and you haven't figured out the difference?"

I had no idea ANYONE had that problem until then, but now I see more and more instances of it. Really weird.
Nov. 5th, 2006 04:16 am (UTC)
That's amusing. Mostly sad, but still amusing. (Either that or I'm just weird.)
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:56 am (UTC)
a wikipedia dictionary SUCKS. Anyone can put up words there really. Pick up any websters, Roget, any proper dictionary.. it's not in there printed and it's still considered SLANG regardless. even by that source, it calls it slang.

And it's wrong.

Just like "D'oh"! made it into the dictionary as slang, it's not really a word, it's lazy speech that so many people have come either to use or mispronounce. Instead of teachers/parents/friends correcting people who make that mistake, they adopt it and voila so many people are saying it WRONG it goes into a dictionary as slang.

It's infuriating.

Don't get me started on written forms....
too many people live with their heads up their asses there.

Nov. 5th, 2006 04:23 am (UTC)
I agree it's slang, and I agree it's wrong. It's still listed in that particular dictionary, though, which means that some people, somewhere, consider it a word. I don't, and you don't, and I don't know anyone (outside of some of my mother's coworkers) who does. But some people do. They may not be right (and I don't think they are), but that's what they think, and I've yet to come up with a way to change what people think when they're dead set on their own version of whatever.

And yes, far too many people live with their heads up their asses when it comes to written forms. Drives me bonkers.
Nov. 5th, 2006 06:25 am (UTC)
Amen and WORD!

Nov. 5th, 2006 03:40 am (UTC)
Only because you are ranting about this, that I didn't scream at the screen. ^^

*twitches with you*
Nov. 5th, 2006 04:41 am (UTC)
Wordy McWord.
Nov. 5th, 2006 10:55 am (UTC)
I have problems with words that are acceptable now, but weren't when I was in school. Back in my day, no one would say kneeled. It was always knelt. It jars me when I see it in a story, and since I read slash/yaoi, I see it a lot. ^_^
Nov. 5th, 2006 11:48 am (UTC)
It's like people want to sag "HUNG"

He was HUNG at dawn
when the proper use would be HANGED


Little things drive me bonkers. Just call me MONK
Nov. 5th, 2006 02:45 pm (UTC)
Conversate is one of my FAVES. I spite use it.
Nov. 5th, 2006 04:06 pm (UTC)
"If you said those things in a Job interview with me? I'd not hire you."

Especially when it's your native tongue. When someone doesn't even make the effort and take care to learn some basic language rules, who's to say that in their job they won't be just as careless and lazy about their work as they are with their language.

There are a few you missed that really get to me:

"Alls you have to do is..." or "alls you gotta do is"

Well I can't remember the others, but yeah. *pat pat* Not watching TV makes me forget how many morons are out there, but yeah. Whenever I catch a Judge Judy or something I'm just flabbergasted at some of these people.
( 20 comments — Leave a comment )

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