February 7th, 2010

BANG FUCK FUCK FUCK KILL ME!

Depressed - a DELL Rant....

I am so Depressed and Frustrated and ANGRY at Dell.

I ordered this Laptop on 9/9/09 and I got it about 5 days later. I opened it, it was just the computer, no disks, no documents, just my laptop. I thought it odd, but frankly didn't think much beyond that. I turn it on, go through the initial set-up (Ya know Name the computer, set up your admin account and password crap on a new installation of Windows) Just as this bugger finishes it's inital set-up... It bluescreened for the first time. It had Vista Home Premium loaded onto it, but I was going to get a free WIndow's 7 OS disk from Dell as soon as it was Available. I thought hell it's vista, it's probably just being wonky as Vista is prone to due occasionally.

I thought it was just perhaps a fluke. How WRONG I WAS.... Over the next month my computer bluescreened progressively more frequently. Even when I had NOTHING drawing on the CPU. We're talking just sitting here displaying the desktop with NO PROGRAMS running at all, not even a browser.

My WIndows7 disk arrived, Mid November and I thought, FINALLY This will fix Vista.

WRONG AGAIN, I got even more Bluescreens than before, like Every 5 god damn minutes. So I try to call Dell and sit on hold for over five hours with NO ONE ANSWERING THE PHONE!!!!! I'm not kidding. Five GOD DAMN HOURS listening to: "We're sorry all technicians are busy, your call is very important to us, please stay on the line, and someone will be with you shortly. Your Wait time will be over five minutes."

That's a hell of a lot more than FIVE GOD DAMN MINUTES.

SO I said FUCK THIS, I'm e-mailing. Got the run around until I finally got a tech.

Enter the next two months of HELL ON EARTH. Mandeepy, sanjay, and a host of other "techs" I can barely understand not only type in broken English, when they do call I have to ask "WHAT?" over and over the accents are so thick.

They had me run a diagnoctic that tool 14 GOD DAMN HOURS and I had to sit here for the whole thing, they failed to tell me it was going to take that long, I started it after they called and instructed me to write down any errors codes that came up. So I started this diagnostic at 3PM and stayed up all FREAKING NIGHT to write down any error codes. Because you can't scroll, once the diagnostic test is off the DOS Screen you cannot scroll back to view it and there are Y and N prompts throughout that need to be answered... There were NO ERROR CODES, NONE!!!! A Wasted 14 hours.

Now they kept asking for stop codes and the blue screens happen so fast I was never able to get the code before it auto restarted and it took ME looking up help forums for days to learn how to turn OFF the auto restart. Not one of the "TECHS" (and I use this term LOOSELY) bothered to tell me how to turn it off when I kept telling them I couldn't get a stop code because the screen was so fast.

Funny, I found the answer with a few hours on GOOGLE.

Next comes the "We are going to have to reformat your whole system."

Me: No you're not unless you're abso-freaking-lutely POSITIVE this is going to solve the issue and you ARE GOING TO SEND ME an external HD for me to save my info. This is YOUR PROBLEM, YOUR PIECE OF CRAP COMPUTER and you will not wipe my data on a whim without giving me a means to backup my data.

Them: NO
Me" YES you will.

They sent me an INTERNAL HD.

So I bought a housing and made it an external and backed up my data... it took me 18 tries to get it without a bluescreen happening half way through the process.

Then 3 weeks later when they FINALLY ANSWER ME BACK about doing this re-format. THEY LIED. They said they tried to call me 4 times. Funny, my phone never rang, I never had a message showing any missed calls, nor did anyone leave a fucking voice mail!

Then the Tech said "I see you replaced the internal HD."

No ass wipe I did not you fucktard. read the whole god damn CASE ISSUE before you assume. You sent me an internal HDD but I certainly did NOT open this laptop case and void my warranty you idiot. I put that internal you sent to me in a case to back up my data. 

Then I had to remind them that they had to send me the software I paid for since they sent no disks with the computer at ALL! (I had mentioned this at the same time we argued about the HDD for backup) Then they sent only the Dell drivers and I had to argue with them repeatedly that I paid extra for Microsoft Office and they damned well better send me the software to reinstall after they have me wipe the drive.

They tired to balk and I told them to suck my ass and they better send me what I paid for or I'd sue their asses.

They sent me the office software and then said "they will call me Tuesday to reformat" I e-mailed back saying FINE talk to you on Tuesday.....

They called me on Saturday and I missed the call because you know, I was told to expect the call on TUESDAY and I actually went to a movie and had my phone OFF when they called at 7:45 PM on Saturday night.

I e-mailed them a new earful of rant.

They e-mailed back so sorries, we call Tuesday.

I sat here all GOD DAMN DAY, 12 hours on Tuesday waiting.

They never called.

I e-mailed fire and brimstone.

They called this past Wednesday. We re-formated from scratch.

I spent 12 hours getting this laptop re-formatted, 4 programs put back on, my printer driver installed and Firefox and then restoring my backup data. That's it.

I restarted the computer, put it to sleep, took a short nap because I had Merry Maid coming over to give me estimates.

I was up, I checked e-mail, closed the browser and it was just sitting here on screen saver while I showed the lady around my house.

As I walked by my computer out of the corner of my eye what do I see?

Bluescreen of Death flashes up really quick and then reboots.


SON OF A FUCKING BITCH!!!!!!!!

This was Thursday. After the lady left I turned off the auto reboot (AGAIN) and e-mailed Dell.

It took them until about 4 hours ago to respond.

They will either FIX THIS piece of shit that has not worked right for a single DAY since I've owned it. Or they will send me a NEW FUCKING LAPTOP!

I've had it!

Never, ever buy DELL. They are pieces of shit and the Technical asswipes could not fix a flat tire with a bicycle pump!