Like going to the bathroom... we all do it, but how many times do you see your Hero or heroine needing to find the powder room desperately?
I've noticed I write this very scenario into a lot of my stories.
Not the actual FUNCTION, just the need to actually get to a place to perform said action.
I'm a sick person.
really, I must be, I find it all very amusing to put imaginary characters into situations where they are doing the "pee-pee" dance.
Title: “Turning of the Tides”
Major pairing: 3x4, 5x2 (OMG a new pairing for me!!!)
Author: The Fablespinner ~*D*~
E-mail: fablespinner@ hotmail.com
Genre: AU, Historical-ish Romance, Fantasy, Sap – Yeah my typical stuff.
Disclaimer: Trowa and Quatre belong to me (In my dreams). In reality they are slaves to Bandai... Oh! Bondage! *snerk*
Author’s Note: Yes, I know I have a gazillion unfinished stuff to work on… Blame rabid plot bunnies with nice visuals in my head for this. My Quatre muse is demanding this, and the Trowa muse is decidedly in favor and wanting to see Quatre in this role, so there you go….
I’m not in the mood to be overly anal about speech patterns and language usage. So the anachronistic turn of phrase is just for ease of reading and writing. It’s the story that matters to me at this point. I hope it’s not too detracting written in more modern flavored turns of phrase.
Also please note, I am not about to go making up a language, or writing in one that already exists only to footnote long phrases of dialogue later. That’s annoying as hell to read right in the middle of a story. Having to flip back and forth to understand what is being said.
So, when Quatre is speaking in proper sentences to Wufei, they are speaking Quatre’s language. When Quatre is sounding like a two year old on crack, he’s trying to speak in Trowa’s. It should be painfully obvious when these instances occur, and we all know people whose native tongue is not English, and they know just a smattering handful of words…
“They sound like strange person talking with the little English they know, but say words well they do know for to make what they want say understand.”
God that sounded like my Grandfather talking there for a minute, we all know people like this that can command just enough of the language to be understood and sound really bold and goofy at the same time. They know absolutely no slang, and sound overly blunt because they have 1/10th of our multitude of words to choose from to say what they feel.
It’s going to be cute for Quatre to be not quite so eloquent for a change, in my opinion. *grin*
I’ve left the exact year/century this takes place in to you, the reader’s, imagination, the setting again, up to you, I’m making it up as I go along to fit my needs. Rules do not apply. Laws do not apply. History as we know it does not apply.
So let us just say it was:
“A long time ago, in a land that never existed, far away….”
Trowa had retired to the low couch by the fire, his eyes shut as he rested and listened to the soft exhalations of sleep from Quatre. Still no changes, when sudden a large gasping intake of air shook the silence of the room, Trowa’s eyes snapped open and he watched a panic stricken youth scream and sit bolt upright in absolute terror, his eyes frantically searching the room, and fear of his strange surroundings attack him without mercy. Trowa was by the quaking youth’s side immediately, hands held out palm up, on his knees and speaking as non-threateningly as possible.
“Shhhhh, it’s all right. You’re safe. Do you understand me?”
Silence met Trowa’s words, non-recognition, or rather outright distrust and panic, and cold with fear eyes looked onto Trowa’s and Trowa felt his very heart chill in a vice like grip of sympathy.
“I will not hurt you, Quatre.”
Suddenly those eyes softened and tears began to fall as Quatre began talking and sobbing in frantic words that seemed jumbled and garbled as he tried to back away from Trowa and melt into the stone masonry of the wall behind him.
Wufei thankfully chose that moment to burst into the room, clothed in only his robe. His hair askew and his face masked with worry. He’d heard and followed the scream.
Quatre’s face turned to the door, and in one moment, the fear fell away and grief and sadness replaced it as Wufei rushed to his side.
“WUFEI? Chang Wufei?” Quatre asked in disbelief as Wufei reached his side and sat on the edge of the bed. He nodded once, and Quatre fell into his comforting embrace sobbing.
“Shhhhh. Quatre, Quatre what is wrong? Why are you here my friend?” Wufei asked in Quatre’s soft and lyrical native tongue.
It took several moments for the sobs to subside before Quatre, still clinging to Wufei in fear, could weakly answer.
And his answer outraged Wufei. He looked at Trowa and Trowa reeled in shock with the look of bloodlust in Wufei’s eyes. A look he had never before seen in his friend’s visage.
“What did he say?”
“I’ll tell you in a moment. First we get him settled. He is more than distraught and rightfully so.” Wufei said smoothing away worry lines from Quatre’s brow as he still held the weeping youth.
“Quatre, look at me my heart brother. You are safe, this man here is named Trowa Barton, he is the Lord here and he is the one who saved you. He is a good man you may trust him in all matters. He will see you righted, have no fear. We will send word to your father immediately.”
“He saved me?”
“Yes, he did. Pulled you from the sea, and cared for you himself.”
With those words, Quatre seemed to straighten with infinite pride and regal humility, as he looked at Trowa with utmost respect before shocking both men and climbing out of bed to prostrate himself at Trowa’s feet.
“Great One Deliver Me to You. I am in Debt to you. My honor to serve you, my Master, until my life debt is pay back to you.”
“Nay, get u…”
“Stop Trowa, do not finish that sentence, you’ll dishonor him.”
“No buts Trowa. His people take life debts very seriously. You DID save his life. You must allow him to satisfy his duty and honor to pay you back. To refuse him would be crushing to his entire family’s pride, he’d suicide as to not dishonor his family name. Tread CAREFULLY. Accept him, now!”
“I’ll not refuse you, but please, get off the floor. I need not a servant, you will honor me more by being my equal and friend while you honor your debt to my person.” Trowa said smiling down at Quatre and holding out his hand.
Quatre looked partially confused.
“You used too much pomp and circumstance Trowa and spoke much too fast for him. He caught about half of what you said. Allow me…” Wufei rolled his eyes and translated the whole of Trowa’s meaning.
After Wufei finished speaking Quatre smiled up at Trowa and took his hand.
“Thank you my Master.”
“Trowa. Please call me… my name is Trowa.”
“He wants you to call him by his name. He is uncomfortable with your manner and the title of ‘Master’ in his culture makes that title sometimes hard to bear. He understands your need to honor him, but he is a simple man and very kind Quatre. Do him this honor and call him by his name. Trowa.”
Quatre nodded towards Wufei and turned back to Trowa.
“Thank you, T -T- wo-wu-wuh-wah” Quatre began, and made a face as he tried twisting his tongue around the unusual name. He was absolutely and utterly charming in his chagrin and frustration.
“Forgive please, hard say name. Towowowa, Torowwa, Torowa.”
Trowa laughed and smiled, close enough. “I know, very bad name isn’t it? I had to practice to say your name too.”
Again, Quatre looked baffled.
“Trowa, you must learn to speak SLOWLY and you have a horrible habit of slurring words. I won’t always be around to translate your lazy speech patterns.” Wufei grumbled then translated.
Quatre’s laugh was divine. “Ah, I see. Then we are, as you say, even?”
Trowa nodded and pulled Quatre up off the floor. “Yes. Even. Now to bed, we will talk in the morning.” Trowa said very slowly and Quatre nodded and allowed Trowa and Wufei to direct him back under the covers.
“Wait, please.” Quatre asked, smiling with a slight apologetic slant.
“I need know, where I go. Need… what is word? Must…” Frustrated he turned to Wufei and spoke in a language he knew better. Wufei laughed.
“What?” Trowa asked perplexed.
“He needs to know where to go relieve himself? He’s about ready to burst.” Wufei smiled as he showed Quatre the chamber pot in the corner.
“For now use this. I’ll show you the other places when you are fit to leave this room.”
“You want me to… INSIDE? That is most unsanitary!”
“You are unwell. A Servant will empty this a few times daily. Your cleanliness will not be affronted.”
“I will go to a place made for the purpose. I am not so weak I cannot walk to where this place is, I will go outside if need to.”
“You will not.”
“I will. I am not a boy anymore Chang Wufei, coddle me NOT!”
“What did you say to make him so angry Wufei? What’s going on?” Trowa asked perplexed as he watched Quatre cross his arms in defiance.
“He refuses to use the chamber pot.”
“It is dirty do that inside! I go to place made to do such things, no dirty cup in room where I sleep!”
“He has a point Wufei, I don’t like chamber pots either.”
“He’s just been dragged in from death, I’ll not have him traversing an unfamiliar castle in the middle of the night! Naked no less.”
“Not know all you say. But you not Quatre mother! I do out that hole in wall first!”
“Wufei, I really don’t think pissing out of his window is a good idea. It’s 300 feet to the garterobe from this room. You are coddling a bit too much. If he has the spirit and energy to fight you so hard, I think he has the spirit to walk to talk a piss.”
“I give up! Fine.” Wufei grumbled taking off his robe, leaving him dressed only in loose silken pants and handing the garment to Quatre. “But cover yourself, you’ll shock the servants.”
Trowa had to cover a snicker with his hand at the look of triumph that spread across Quatre’s face as he pulled the robe over his shoulders and stood slowly.
“Where I go?”
“This way.” Trowa offered his arm for support and Quatre took it gratefully.
“I am thank you for much kindness to me. I do no like the cup.”
“Neither do I. I understand. And you are welcome” Trowa said as they walked slowly down the corridor lit softly with torches. Quatre’s steps were lethargic and slow, but steady enough. Quatre smiled up at him in genuine appreciation.
Having Quatre standing beside him, Trowa realized he wasn’t quite so frail as he had seemed in a prone state. He was of a good height comparatively to other men. Trowa was the one out of the norm where his unusual height was concerned.
Quatre was also of a very nice build, he was not robust, but neither was he without definition. He had in Trowa’s opinion, a very nice physique. Firm, compact, trim, and any further thoughts along those lines were going to cause Trowa problems. Funnily while Quatre had been asleep, none of these things had even crossed Trowa’s mind, he had been concerned for his health, and fascinated by his exotic looks, but having Quatre active and mobile, his reality of being a real live person hit home.
Trowa had never in his life ever dreamed of meeting someone so unique. This was the same way he had felt upon meeting Wufei.
Trowa came to the conclusion he decidedly like foreigners, they absolutely made his whole world come alive with wonder.
It wasn’t a very long walk to the room Trowa had built specifically for this purpose. He led Quatre inside and he stopped short in wonder.
There were large marble tiled tubs in the center of the room. Some steaming invitingly, some that smelled divinely fragrant, and a rather large one in the center that had a drainage along it’s outer edges and in the center a fountain bubbling merrily. Quatre’s eyes went wide with wonder.
“What… all this water! How?”
Trowa smiled, “This is the bathing room. When you want to wash yourself, come here. This tub is kept hot always for washing, this one is for your body if you are sore, and this one here in the center is for rinsing.”
“But, is not waste of water?”
“We are not short of water. No this is not a waste, this room uses very little water wastefully.”
“Not like Quatre home. Water very little have. I think Quatre will like this room much yes.” Quatre said smiling like a child with a new toy. As Trowa led him across the room through another set of doors.
“Here is the room you seek.” Several small seats sat along an outer wall. Their purpose obvious if you looked down the hole the seats sat above.
“Still inside, but clean. How so clean and… word for… no smell?”
Trowa pointed to a lever on the wall then pulled it. Water came from a cistern located above their heads and down a channel that flushed any lingering debris away.
“That collects rain water from above, and the hole leads to a pit quite a long way away from here. I studied much about this sort of thing in my youth. I built this room.”
“You like Go see great ruin city in my land. Before desert come, they have like this, when water not gone from my land. This like what I have seen, only not nice, a ruin place.”
“I would love to see it one day, I read about it, it is where I got the idea.” Trowa said excusing himself momentarily with a bow so Quatre could do his business.
He heard the water run, and Quatre stepped out a moment later. “You, very smart man. I must say it strong. I very much think I like Trowa home much.”
“I’m pleased to hear that.” Trowa said leading Quatre back to his room. “Think you can find that room again if you need it?”
“I will find on own. I think if ever you miss Quatre, you know where Quatre be finded again.” Quatre laughed brightly as he shed the robe and handed it back to an irate Wufei who sat pouting at the table in Quatre’s room.
Quatre leaned over and kissed his cheek before turning to bed. “Thank you, Quatre know Wufei mad. But need that.”
“I know, just go to bed. You have not changed, stubborn then, stubborn now.” Wufei grumbled pulling on his robe and following Trowa out the door.
“Good Night, Quatre very much wish Torowa, Wufei sleep good.” Quatre said crawling into bed and smiling as the door shut behind his benefactors.
“He’s quite charming.” Trowa said as he and Wufei walked toward the main hall.
“He is, yes. Trowa, we need to talk. Quatre’s been kidnapped…”
Trowa stopped and spun to look at Wufei, whose eyes were hard as daggers.
“You know who did this don’t you?”
“I know who, I know when, and worse, I know WHY. You will need wine before I tell you. You will be very angry when you hear what I am about to tell you.”
Trowa’s spirits sank as he and Wufei settled at the main table and began a long night of talk over un-diluted wine.