If there is one person or more on your friends list who makes your world a better place just because they exist, and who you would not have met (in real life or not) without the Internet, then post this same sentence in your journal.

There are many of you, I adore you all!

It didn't get any better so Mom took me over to the ER (John took Benedryl before bed and was far too groggy... not to mention my beloved it rather a basket case if I have the sniffles let alone am actually INJURED. As much as I adore John, he so did not need to be stressing...) Two hours and several x-rays later...

Nothing is broken *Whew*

But I have one massive, killer, honking bruise smack dab on my tailbone. So big it showed up on the x-ray! O_o I also have severe lumbar muscle strain, i already sorta figured that one out myself.

So I got released after two hours and have a prescription for some Lortab and Flexerill (Pain killer and muscle relaxer) and the Doctor gave me orders to rest, because the pain sadly will get worse over the next few days before it gets better *sigh*

But I'm glad I went, better safe than sorry when I fell that HARD on my ass. My knee is already turning purple and I so do not want to know what my ass looks like.

So I'm just gonna relax on the couch a while, I don't want to wake John up going to bed, He's been busting his ass lately and needs the sleep, I can go to bed when he gets up in a few hours, I can doze on the couch until then.

The Lortab they gave me in the ER is finally kicking in as so long as I don't move I feel Okay. Any movement however is still agony, so it looks like I am sitting STILL for the forseeable future.

Hey any of you going to this:
BISHIE CON

I'm gonna go this year, it's sort of like mini y-con Midwest (In St. Louis) It's 277 miles, about 4 hour drive, I can do that.
I'm going to do an art panel An Anatomy 101 sort of beginner basics and the most common mistakes made in male anatomy
(Let's face it the ones we see daily on y-gallery) I call them the seven deadly Yaoi-art sins:


7 Yaoi Art Sins...

1.) Package Space (Ya know where legs make a perfect triangle to the groin, no room for stuff in pants my #1 pet peeve!)
2.) Itty Bitty Hand Committee (Self-explanatory)
3.) Brainless (No room for a brain in that flat top head!)
4.) Foot Free (Lets not draw feet and cut them off entirely!)
5.) Child-Bearing Hips? (Ugh, Guys do not have hourglass figures without implants!!!!)
6.) Belly Button Penii Attachments (We all laugh at this one do we not? Just stick that Penis anywhere like Pin the Penis on the GayGuy!)
7.) Anus Target Practice (It does not belong there kiddies! LOLLER SKATES)

SO yeah, any of you going and if so let me know I won't be alone!!!!! *wibble*

Well, I am still living in nothing but boxes, and I have more briuses on my shins from banging into said boxes that I look like a chartruese and purple punching bag... but it's coming together slowly. First Anniversary came and went in a sea of moving chaos. Time certainly flies. I just thought I'd check in and alert everyone I'm not dead or lost even if I feel like it. :)

Well all moved and my old house just got cable and internet wired today... I'm still in a SEA of boxes and more will be added Friday when my parents move into the basement and we're still getting the straggler moved out of my condo and getting that ready for sale and an open house Sunday... but...

ACK so much to do, but the monster's back is at least broken.

Back to massive work, just popping into say I am alive, sore as fuck and exhausted but soon, yes SOON all will be wonderful.

The upside... my new bed is sooooooooooooooooooooo comfortable.

*sigh*

Ya know, sometimes I am really glad I am a cynical bitch who NEVER takes anything at face value, because the old adage "If it's too good to be true, it probably is..."

Today in the Mail I received a letter on quite professional looking stationary with a "No postage necessary" reply envelope for responses etc... and upon reading the letter which says: (Typed Verbatim including their exact punctuation and use of bold and italics)

----------------

RESPONSE NECESSARY BY 5/27/09

Dear Dana,

You were recently appointed as a biographical candidate to represent Louisville, KY in the 2009/2010 online Cambridge Who's Who Resistry among Executives and Professionals.

We are please to inform you that on April 28, 2009, your candidacy was approved. Your prompt response is needed to ensure your correct professional information. For accuracy purposes, please be sure to visit your personal website to verify your biographical information at:


If you do not have internet access, please fill out and return the enclosed reply card by May 27, 2009. We provided the postage for your convenience.

The office of the Managing Director appoints individuals based upon a candidate's current position, and usually with information obtained from researched executive and professional listings. The Director thinks that you may make an interesting biographical subject, as individual achievement is what Cambridge Who's Who is all about.

Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among thousands of accomplished individuals in the Cambridge Who's Who Registry. Remember, there is no cost included.

On behalf of the Managing Director, we look forward to your appearance in this year's edition. Best wishes for continued success.

Sincerely,

M. Foster (With image ready signature, not a real one)
Editor in Chief

-------------------

My first thought?.... Riiiiiiiiiiiiight. here is never a NO COST involved letter like this so I went right to Google rather than the provided link, because I do not trust arbitrary links in e-mails, why the fuck would I trust one in a letter?

My second thought? Why? Who would use this registry? My customers certainly wouldn't. Why would I want to be on a list of other people that can put OWNER, PRESIDENT, ETC.. on a business card? Seems like nothing more than an a silly ego stroke list to me and I don't need it thanks.... Seemed a rather egotistical thing to do actually and extremely pointless. However, I wanted to confirm my hunches where sound and went to the computer and pulled up my browser....

Sure enough, about six or seven Google searches down the page after the actual Cambridge Pages come up on the search, you find dozens and more links about Scams, fakes and you guessed it... FRAUD... They will eventually ask you from anywhere to $100 - $1000 bucks to include you on this bogus registry. Even though the letter CLEARLY states otherwise.

I can always smell a rotten tuna, and this one sure stank before I ever opened the envelope! Hello, Mr. Shredder, are you hungry boy?

Goodbye Scam letter, and heads up to my friends don't fall for this sort of bullshit. Google is so your FRIEND.

I started reading Leven Thumps series by Obert Skye...

OMG it's fucking brilliant. Whomever compared this to Harry Potter is on Crack. Other than the lead character is an Orphan boy who lived with crappy relatives in the beginning that's about as close to Harry and LEVEN gets.

The humor however in Obert Skye's books totally blows away JK ROwling. This guy has me howling with laughter with his, shall we say, decriptive metaphors. I want whatever Obert Skye is smoking.

Let's see we have
FOO - The land of our Dreams basically
Reality - Our World
Leven, really likeable 14 year old that really is thrust into things no kid should be and he grows well in the books. (I'm only up to book #2)
Clover Earnest - Leven's Synchophant.... well Clover is just a hoot, Realy too hard to describe, just yeah, AWESOME SIDEKICK!
Geth - The King of Foo, or Heir to the throne really, if he hadn't been captured into a seed by the evil Sabine, then smuggled into our world (REALITY), then planted and grown as a tree, subsequently chopped down, tossed into a woodchipper and then made into a toothpick! LOL! Yes, a toothpick! HEY YOU! I'll poke your eye out!
Winter - Eh... we'll see how she grows as a character she's rather bland to me so far other than she can of course freeze things like her etire 7th grade class and teacher. Yes, don't we all wish we could have done that?

The Bad guys:
Sabine - was never really developed much but a good plot mover
Ezra - The OTHER toothpick... When Geth got woodchopped, his good and bad sides got split up... Ezra rocks my socks, a toothpick with attitude complete with a fancy party purple cellophane topper. Geth was just a PLAIN toothpick that ended up in a diner... Ezra was a PARTY SANDWICH TOOTHPICK so much more STYLE! LOL


Just, yeah, go read these they crack me up!

as most of you know, John and I bought a new house and we will be moving in on May15th...

So... here's the New Address my Lovelies!

John & Dana Armstrong
918 Cannons Lane
Louisville, KY 40207
USA

My Cell is still: 502-819-3918

xoxxoxo

Hopefully this will be the LAST TIME any of you have to change my address.
*back to work.... arrrgh so much left to do!*

It's only Day #3 of the Great Move... and I am in so much pain I cannot believe it... and I haven't even begun PACKING YET! *cries*

Between a gazillion phone calls to various and sundry handy men and contractors, a bazillion trips back and forth to Home Depot & Lowes, getting four toilets and a garbage disposal installed, carpets measured, landscaper and pool guy quotes for service and maintenance, painting, getting mail forwarded for the 15th, utilities sorted, trying to avoid my condo neighbors because well, I cannot stand them and my downstairs neighbor, the neurotic bitch from hell calls John all day over the frigging water bill, and blaming our upstairs neighbors for the massive bill hike, well DUH, they leave the water on all the time and we've told you this, *AND* asked them to stop leaving water on on numerous occasions. I cannot get out of this condo association FAST ENOUGH, They all drive me to distraction! No one gets along with each other and all DUMP their problems on John to be the middle man. Any problem, instead of going to the SOURCE, they go to JOHN. *ARRRGH* You're all fucking grown ups, act like them for goodness sakes! Then I planted a couple of plants in my topsy turvy, yes, I bought some, 'cause ya know, I'm silly like that and want tomatoes and cucumbers, and trying to help John paint and finding out that:

#1: My storm shelter, which we thought would be a quick and easy slap dash white wash took 2 days to paint! The rough concrete from floor to ceiling and all the raw wood shelves SUCKED UP 5 gallons of paint! It's only a 12x14 room! I'm gonna use that as my storage for my store, it's perfect and I still have to put contact paper down on all the shelves, waiting for the paint to dry....

Then today,

#2 Trying to primer Dad's room with heavy duty, stain cover to max, best of the bunch, multi purpose kick ass primer took THREE FUCKING COATS to cover the pervasive neon BLUE his room was painted and it is still poking through in a few places. *faints* Never ever paint your walls BLUE unless you never, ever decide to change the color. Or unless you really, really want the next people to own your home, swearing at you until the air is as blue as those fucking walls! (Looks at my DIning Room and John's office *cringe* Sorry next people hope you like John's faux painting because it's really BLUE.)


OMG, I am behind, I can't find fucking anything, My Condo is in SHAMBLES, my HOUSE is well a wreck, I can't tell which way is up and I *HURT ALL OVER* I'm talking massive back spasms from all the standing, moving, stooping, climbing stairs etc... I tried helping John paint and now my carpal tunnel is on FIRE and my right thumb is throbbing like a Mo' Fo.

I still haven't packed SHIT, I am behind, stressed, feeling guilty about nightambre 's Order because well, all my store stuff is scattered to the nine levels of hell right now (And babe, because it's late, be prepared for lots of extra goodies in your box as a thank you for being so patient with me during the CHAOS that is my life!)

I just want to cry and I can't, too much to do and not enough time to do it all. *sigh*

Anyone have a smith and wesson? Because I don't think Advil is quite gonna cut it to aleviate this pain right now. I'm exhausted and cannot sleep because when I lay down my back spasms. *whimper*

We finally, after hours of paperwork and lawyers, we closed on the House. YAY, it's all ours at last.

We then went right to Home Depot and dropped another six grand (OUCH!) this evening on a New LG Fridge, LG Steam Washer and Dryer, GE Ceramic Counter Stove top, Range hood exhaust microwave combo and paint supplies. *faints*

I am bloody exhausted and the ordeal is just beginning. Painting, renovating and moving... *dies*


Oh and Jeanette... I have your order, I am in the middle of CHAOS, I will get this out to you as fast as I can, I just got buried in Move and half my stuff in in boxes ready to be moved over to the new house. YIKES! I thought I could pack and get moved in-between orders and yours came in, I'll get it out as quickly as humanly possible.

O_O

WAH!


- STRESS WHAT STRESS?

Well our first bid was accepted on the house! YAY!
inspection is Monday and if all goes well closing will be within 30 days!
WE HOPE!

(The first go around on the last house the bank appraisal tanked our loan. It appraised far less than the agreed price and they would not re-negotiate price. :( So that went by way of the DoDo, the second house they wouldn't negotiate at all and they are asking too much for the market) Let's hope the third time is a Charm!

CLICK HERE TO SEE THE HOUSE LISTING AND CLICK ON THE PHOTO TO SEE MORE PHOTOS

Sadly no interior shots but this has a great yard, a pool and a wonderful layout inside. It is SO MUCH BIGGER than it looks!

SAVE THE DATE!

Every year I hold the Pr0n Party in my Suite and this year it will be:
Friday Night, October 30th @ 9PM

Bring your worst Pr0n, Animated or Live Action for a screening and MSTing fun!

Only the Best WORST!

Last year's best of the worst was some horrible Gay Samurai Bikers on a Harley they were selling at Media Blasters! ROTFLMAO! Priceless!

I'll post my Suite Number once I check in, but save the date! We're holding it Friday instead of Saturday since we don't want to keep people from the Bishie Auction and Dance on Saturday Night.

:)

Hair & Scalp Treatments

• HairDew™ Shampoo & Conditioner
  All Natural Personalized Shampoo w/ Silk Amino Acids and scalp nourishing honey. Ideal for those that suffer Acne and/or Breakouts on Scalp and Hairline. Conditioners with Aloe and Jojoba Oil to pamper your hair and scalp.

:)

And DAMN it works great on static too! I have BABY FINE hair and my hair always looks like I just rubbed a balloon on it and sticks to my forehead from static (Unless I goop it with gels and hairspray). Not anymore! Yippee!!!

:)

Tonight during Rachel Maddow on MSNBC they covered a story I *KNEW* was going to hit the fan when I first saw the "art" appear on the scene back during Obama's election campaign.

The "HOPE" Poster. I saw IMMEDIATELY the first time I laid eyes on it that it was a VECTOR TRACE of the Associated Press (AP) Photo that came out early on in the campaign.

I said to myself MONTHS AGO: "That guys gonna get in serious trouble over that eventually, Tracing is Bad MMMM'Kay"

Tonight on Rachel Maddow we find out that the AP (Associated Press) is suing Mr. Shepard Fairey "artist" for infringement and he's on Rachel Maddow giving some bullshit excuse about "OMG EXpression is liek Art"


Fuck You NO, it's tracing a Photo Goober in Photoshop or Illustrator. It's not ART.

(Do a Photoshop overlay of the two pictures, they line up LINE FOR LINE ----> TRACE JOB! You are BUSTED Mr. Fairey!)

Some lovely person already did and overlay:
LINK TO OVERLAY

and I love the comment on the article that referenced that link! OMG THE AP JUST TOOK OUT THE BLUE AND ARE DISTORTING THE POSTER TO FIT THEIR ARGUMENT EVUL AP! LOL LOL LOL

What an IDIOT! It's proving a trace job fucktard! *brain hurts*

Any word on Hotel or Dates yet?
:(

It's just gonna be me this year, While John liked parts of the con, there is a sad LACK of things for a guy to do, even a bi-guy. He really just wanted to meet my friends.

So I'm coming myself this year so caerfree  Want to share room again like before?

and where the HECK has caro_t  gone? Not heard from her since SEPTEMBER. Is she okay? I called and her # just rang and rang.
:(

I'm going through and filing all my products with the FDA VCRP (Ya know those pesky ingredient labels, I have to file a form for each individual ingredient in all my stuff... *EYES BLEED*)

The irritating part? The Nomenclature I have for some of the ingredients are not on the FDA list.
Well they *ARE* But it's a HIDE AND SEEK Game -- You know the government, they like to spell things different, add words like HYDROGENATED, UNHYDROGENATED (When neither is necessary. That's WET OR DRY FOLKS WHO CARES!) Hyphenate words, split up copolymers into two separate entries, etc.. they do this to things randomly so it's a pain in the ass to track down my ingredients on their list, get the 9 digit FDA code to put on the form.

Because you  know I am NOT a scientist and I don't readily know an alternative nomenclature to all these things nor magically pull them out of my ASS!

Because seriously it took me long enough to find that the LATIN name for
SHEA BUTTER = BUTYROSPERMUM PARKII (Yeah I totally would have known THAT! Sounds just like SHEA BUTTER!)

That's one of many WTFery names I have to put on a label for innocuous stuff. Castor Seed Oil is "RICINUS COMMUNIS SEED OIL" for example. Yeah that totally sounds like CASTOR OIL I could have found that easily! NOT!

I mean come on, MOST PEOPLE would not know that. What a pain in the ASS just call it fucking SHEA BUTTER or CASTOR SEED OIL, who speaks LATIN other than scientists or Ancient History Students these days?

I think it's counterproductive actually for the retail public and subsequently retailers and manufacturers like myself. Reading labels like that makes one thinks OMG CHEMICALS!!!! When there's not a single chemical in there only butters and oils that sound frankly SCARY once applied with a LATIN nomenclature.

RAWR.

end rant

Tune in Here:

http://www.theyoungturks.com/

On Monday, March 16th, 2008 Between 6-9 PM EST (John will be on around 8 PM)

:)

They will be discussing his book. "God vs. The Bible"

If you Miss the Program Live, don't worry they are archived on the site too.
and also on their YouTube Page:
http://www.youtube.com/theyoungturks